I want to be known, not noticed

In 2009, Rachel Crandall Crocker founded Trans Day of Visibility as a joyful addition to Trans Day of Remembrance, the other side of the coin in trans-focused holidays. The intent was good, but many of us feel disconnected from this holiday. For me at least, that feeling has only grown over the last few years. I get the yearning for representation: I feel it, too! But representation isn’t freedom, equity, or safety. 

Trans people have been talking about it since the founding: visibility without safety isn’t enough. In fact, plenty of trans people are highly visible and specifically targeted because of it. As Miss Major said, specifically about Black girls, “Our visibility is getting us killed.” Current executive orders only strengthen that perspective.

But I too want to find something like joy in the midst of all this shit. And it can be there: Trans Day of Having a Nice Snack and/or Buying a Trans Woman a Pizza, “no don’t look at me” jokes, Breaking the Binary’s Cloud Nine Zine, being held and known by the people close to me.

I guess that’s all it comes down to, really. I don’t want to be visible, noticed. I want to be known. I want to be understood. 

Sunbeams on leaves, a
nourishing favor – I too
dream of good labor.

This year Breaking the Binary chose my piece Cloud Nine Caretaker to be part of their Cloud Nine Zine, available now for free. Cloud Nine Caretaker is a solo, journaling game where you play a groundskeeper of Cloud Nine, tasked with caring for a place that elicits elation and well-being in its people and visitors.

I really like this piece. I think you can easily find my yearning for joy, sweetness, and safety in it. I’m hoping to expand it a bit more and release it on itch as well, eventually.

But for now, check it out here! 

Support Opportunities 

Give a trans person in your life (who is NOT me) $$ to get a nice snack or pizza
BTFA Collective
Campaign for Southern Equality’s Trans Youth Emergency Project Fund
Gaza Soup Kitchen
SMYAL
Third Wave Fund

And a personal ask: My apartment complex’s Tenant’s Association is pursuing litigation against our owners for skirting the rights afforded us by DC law to a fair bargaining process when the building was sold. Due to an issue connecting our bank account to the GoFundMe, all of the money we had raised over the past few months was refunded. We’ve since fixed the issue, but we’re back at the starting line for fundraising. It’d mean so much to me if you supported by donating to our GoFundMe, or sharing it with anyone you think might be invested in our cause.